Trial and Error

Lately I have been itching to get out of St. Louis. I love it here, don't get me wrong. I don't want to go away forever. I think. But I want to go away for a week, or a month, or a year. I don't know where. I just want to leave. I want to explore. I want to live in a different place all the time. I want to travel the world. I want to have a friend in as many countries as possible. I want to pick up and walk away from everything I know so that I will be forced to discover things about myself that I didn't know. I am tired of reading about the world. Well, that's not completely true. I will never tire of reading. But I want to see it for myself. Instead of looking at pictures online, I want to look at pictures that I took with my own camera.

I want to be crazy and let go of my inhibitions. I've been doing a pretty good job at that but I just want to not care about what people think of me. I want to live for myself and do what I want to do. There are things I do that my friends hate the idea of. There are things I want to do that my friends hate the idea of. Why should I care? Well, I live for my friends. I don't want to lose my friends. But are they really my friends if they would judge me for something that I want to do? That's a question I don't know the answer to.

In other news...

My updated list:
1. DONE
2. Clean my room
3. Clean out my car, Bertha
4. Purge my clothing
5. Reorganize my clothing
6. Perform in Cinderella Goes Disco
7. Cannot be done due to outside circumstances, unless company members prove themselves to be shockingly productive.
8. DONE
9. Call Jennifer about the job.
10. Pay Miranda for Paramore/No Doubt tickets
11. DONE
12. Pay off credit card
13. Read five new books
14. DONE
15. Sell back books
16. Attend theatre banquet
17. Reconnect with at least one old friend
18. Pass playwriting
19. Finish That 70's Show
20. Buy a pretty dress

I'm lacking in productivity...but also, I have begun several items on the list but cannot cross them off yet.

Signing off,
Abigail